Preston Contact Details
L'Arche Preston3 Moor Park Avenue
Preston
PR1 6AS.
Email: preston@larche.org.uk
Telephone: 01772 251113
Fax: 01772 251113
About L'Arche Preston
In brief: a shared residential house and an office.
L'Arche Preston is the youngest of the LArche UK communities, founded in 1998 and presently home to 11 members, five of whom have learning disabilities. Other community members include two families living nearby, the local management committee and other active supporters.
The seeds of L'Arche Preston were sown over ten years ago, when a group of local people identified a need for L'Arche in their town, and began the planning and praying for their hope to become reality. The result is a lovely old Victorian house overlooking the park, which is just a short distance away from the town centre. And the members with learning disabilities are nearly all young people, most of whom went to school together in Preston, and who now work or attend placements in the locality. Their families are an important part of the community frequent visitors who enrich the life of L'Arche Preston, and who have developed bonds of friendship with the other families and members. All the different members combine to make L'Arche Preston a vibrant and dynamic place, befitting the age and interests of the young adults at its core.
Preston itself is a town of 135,000 people, home to one of the biggest universities in the country, whose prosperity was built on the mill industry and as a port. This history has been preserved in some fine architecture, and the town centre provides facilities which are only outnumbered by Manchester and Liverpool in the region. Like many northern towns, the countryside is right on the doorstep, and the community enjoys many days out in the Ribble Valley, the Forest of Bowland and Lake District.
Our sense of Community is central to the life of the community is its faith, which is rooted in the Christian tradition and is welcoming and respectful to those of all faiths or none. This faith identity helps L'Arche Preston have a clear sense of the meaning and purpose of community life:
- COMMUNITY means a house is a home for everyone there - whatever length of time they stay.
- COMMUNITY means eating together, celebrating together, sharing the tasks of daily living, such as going shopping, cooking, doing the dishes etc.
- COMMUNITY means living in a shared spirit, which enables a quality of relationship between all members of the community
- COMMUNITY involves being part of the wider local community, networks and parishes.
Can you help?
In order to foster this unique lifestyle and integrate more fully into the local community of Preston, we need people's help.
How to help:
- By considering spending time in our house as an assistant;
- By joining our support group of friends;
- By donating money or helping with fundraising, to provide the material resources we need.
Please do contact us, if you would like to take your interest further.
A Parent's View - by Karen Cowburn
It is often said when a woman is pregnant that she is 'expecting'. These expectations reach much further out into the child's future than just the birth, for our children hold such hope and promise for us as parents.
I remember seeing our second child for the first time - her hands were so tiny, and yet even then her fingers were long and slender. Could she be our concert pianist, we wondered? We had high hopes and dreams, and other expectations we even considered our right. It went without saying that she would learn to crawl, walk and talk, like her then two year old talkative brother. And that she would grow from totally dependent babyhood through the stages of toddler, child, adolescent, following our chosen education path to become - who knows? And also that my role as her mother would pass through phases: carer in the early years then confidante and friend as she became a woman in her own right.
Shortly after her birth we learned that Emma's brain had been damaged. All our expectations were shattered - we no longer dared to look into the future. There were no certainties any more. We lived day by day, week by week. As we grieved for our lost 'expected' daughter, we struggled to cope with Emma. It was not easy - as a young child she screamed and cried for most of each day and night. She showed signs of autism, such as in her obsessive behaviour, and this was often made worse by the effects of epilepsy. We belonged to a whole new world now, of professionals, doctors, psychologists, teachers and also other parents and families with disabled children. Yet one of the many gifts that Emma has brought to our lives is the people we have met because of her.
By the age of three, Emma began to attend a special school. With love and support she blossomed in confidence and finally her unique and infectious personality came shining through.
Like most parents of a child with learning disability we had a persistent, deep and an often unspoken fear: 'who will look after our daughter when we're no longer here or able to do it?' As Emma neared the end of her school years, we felt we must face our fear, and also enable her to experience what most others her age enjoy - becoming an independent young adult. But how and where?
As we thought and searched, we realised that it wasn't about 'how' or 'where' she lived, but 'with whom?'. The important things were not so much facilities or programmes, but people and relationships. We heard about L'Arche, a Christian-inspired group of communities, that welcomes adults with learning disabilities, as equals with assistants, living in ordinary houses.
We read all we could about L'Arche and visited some of its communities. We met people who were trying to start a L'Arche community in Preston, not far from our home in Blackburn, and we increasingly felt that this was our - and more importantly, Emma's - way forward. Although we had not particularly considered her living in a faith community, it was here that we all discovered the warmth and care about her as a whole person that we so longed for.
Fortunately, L'Arche Preston became a reality, and Emma was welcomed as only its second member with learning disabilities in June 1998, when she was 20 years old.
Letting go is probably the hardest and ultimately most unselfish thing that we as parents can do for our children. Emma's move to L'Arche was only made bearable by our conviction that her life within L'Arche offered opportunities which we could not provide, and that we would still be able to share in those experiences.
Our fear for Emma's future seems almost to have evaporated. Living in L'Arche is about sharing each other's gifts, strengths and weaknesses - the call to community begun by Jean Vanier in 1964 is like a steady rhythm that beats at the heart of each community home.
Although letting Emma go to L'Arche was so hard, I did not imagine that I would also gain. L'Arche's gift is to give me back many of those long lost hopes and expectations. Emma has a life of her own now, she is a young woman in her own right. With love and support she is enabled to live as independently as possible. And as I am now freed of my role of personal carer, I am able to enjoy a mother-daughter relationship I never dreamed possible. Just to call in for a cup of tea and a chat is extraordinary in its ordinariness.
Through the relationships that Emma is part of, then so are we. As each one touches her life, so it does ours. We share together our experience with other parents of L'Arche members, for just as their lives are joined, so we share the connection too.
We have begun to look forward again, without the fear, but full of hope, joy and yes, expectation.
Taking the plunge as a L'Arche assistant - by Mollie Greenwood
I've been taking some time to reflect on my life as a Methodist Deaconess and then a Methodist Minister, for over thirty years, and now my life as an assistant in L'Arche Preston.
In many ways it is quite different. I cook and clean and wash and shop rather than write sermons, chair numerous committees, have pastoral responsibilities and spend long hours at a desk. But the main thing in common is that as a minister I was always people oriented and so I am here.
I believe very strongly in the 'priesthood of all believers'. That is, every Christian has an equal part to play. Here at L'Arche this is so true. In name we divide into 'adults with learning disabilities' and assistants; in practice, each person brings so much to the community. I believed that before I came; I understand it much better now. For example, Jenny¹s capacity to show affection frees me up to be far more demonstrative than I¹ve ever been in my life. The other day I heard myself say to the priest who was staying for a meal 'would you like some more, love?' I then apologised for calling him love. He said 'I like it!' It made him feel included, and we all want to feel that.
As a minister I was very much in the business of helping people grow. Some of the best times were when I sat down with others to prepare acts of worship. It often took three times as long, but for all concerned, and especially those who had participated, it was an enriching experience. Here the same is true. It really matters that we give each other time to choose what to wear or what cereal we eat at breakfast. Time to listen to each other's stories. Time to help each other participate in cooking and shopping.
For me, living in community rather than alone in a large manse has not proved difficult. I think this is because the manse was my workplace as well as my home, and I never really felt off-duty unless I was away from home.
Another similarity is that the congregations with whom I have worked have always been a mixture of people. Some I would naturally feel more drawn to than others, but I was committed to them all. Here I am living with nine other people who are each very different. I am committed to them and they to me and we have to find ways of being a family and making the relationships work. Life is never dull!
I was given the opportunity to come to L'Arche in my last year before retirement. At the end of the year I intend to buy a house and if my retired friends are anything to go by, I will be as busy in retirement as I have been working.
I see my time here as part of my ministry. I am sure my experiences here will influence my understanding of others in the years to come. I can recommend it!
Martin - by Lee Shenton
There's a peacefulness around Martin, the calmness of someone who is at ease with himself. He changes all our lives, with gentleness and subtlety. He is a peacemaker, someone who reconciles and guides his friends in simple, wordless ways. And yet, he is so refreshing to be with, he gives you so much energy. Just to go for a walk with Martin is a joy.
I spend a lot of time with Martin, and over the last six months we¹ve really got to know each other. I¹ve seen small but significant changes taking place in him. He is growing in responsibility within the house, and although he likes his own space, he takes an increasingly active part in social activities. His smile and his openness make him popular with everyone. And yet, for all he is gaining by living in community, he is giving even more.
When he's settling down to sleep, you can hear Martin babbling happily to himself, as if he¹s resolving all the events of the day. One night I woke up because I was worrying about something, and he must have been awake too, because from a neighbouring room I could hear his gentle banter. It was like a soothing lullaby. Listening to him, I forgot my worries and drifted off into a pleasant sleep. Martin was helping me, as he so often does, not the other way around.
Without saying a word, Martin has helped me to learn more about myself and how to respond to people with learning disabilities. I might think I¹m here to do a job for him, by helping him, but it is Martin who is doing something for me and for all of us. I feel lucky to know him.